So, you wanna smell like an old cathedral

Perhaps irreverently so.

Originally published March 2024, updated April 2025

Though it certainly has its faults, perhaps too generous to name, the Catholic Church is nothing if not triumphant at a distinct fragrance. And a free one, at that. Having been brought up in the Church, there is no scent more nostalgic for me than that of an old, woody, smokey, incense-filled church. And it’s a great comfort to me knowing that, no matter where I am in the world, I can count on the presence of an old church to conjure up a feeling of familiarity and home (even if that sense of familiarity is yet bittersweet). In London, it’s Brompton Oratory. In Paris, it’s Saint-Augustin. In Rome, it’s Santa Maria Maggiore. And at home in New York, it’s old Saint Patrick’s Cathedral.

That said, the term “Catholic guilt” wasn’t coined for no reason, and I am genuinely surprised they haven’t started charging for the simple indulgence of a quick whiff, offering Venmo at the door, as I’m sure that’s somehow considered gluttony or heavenknowswhat. Maybe I shouldn’t even put this thought into the ether as my old church started charging $1 to use the bathroom. I wish I were kidding.

Anyways, in honor of Holy Week, I present you with some of my favorite fragrances that delicately bottle the sacred aroma of a Catholic church (minus the lingering guilt, shame, and penance).

Comme des Garçons Avignon

Smells like: smoke-filled solemnity after a Sunday sermon. (Well, that was nice, and now it’s time to go home and watch The Conjuring!)

Notes: elemi, Roman chamomile, aldehydes, French labdanum, spices, ambrette, incense, myrrh, olibanum, Virginia cedar, Brazilian rosewood, patchouli, oakmoss, vanilla and musk.

Gucci A Gloaming Night

Smells like: the glowing apparition of a nun in a horror film. If you’ve seen the 2018 film The Nun, which I highly recommend if only for its aesthetic properties, you’ll understand immediately. Dark, mystical, complex, and unpredictable.

Notes: cinnamon, vetiver, patchouli.

Heeley Paris Cardinal

Smells like: the oldest, smokiest, most reverberating, mysterious, awe-inspiring cathedral in France, bottled with hints of both nostalgia and terror. (The brand describes it as smelling like “an immaculate young priest”, which, fine, I’ll take it.)

Notes: aldehyde, black pepper, pink pepper, cistus, incense, ambergris, patchouli, vetiver.

Aesop Ouranon

Smells like: post-Confession, pre-temptation lightness and the trails of a Gregorian chant in the distance.

Notes: lavender, elemi, petitgrain, hay, frankincense, chamomile, myrrh, patchouli and tonka bean

Thin Wild Mercury Girl of the Year

Smells like: smoking lipstick-stained cigarettes in the stairwell of your all girls’ school dormitory. (I wouldn’t know anything about this.)

Notes: lipstick, incense, leather, smoke, sandalwood, and fur.

Jil Sander Smoke

Smells like: a freshly dry-cleaned, tailored coat (perhaps procured at Gammarelli in Rome) hanging by a damp, stone fireplace.

Notes: elemi, aldehydes, cedarwood, cade oil.

Maison d’Etto Rotano

Smells like: creaky, old, patinated leather kneelers, minus the subsequent knee pain.

Notes: cypriol, halo musk, stallion accord, suede, myrrh, olibanum, cedarwood heart

L’Artisan Parfumeur Passage d'Enfer

Smells like: the splintering wooden beams supporting an old rural chapel, ensconced in heavenly light.

Notes: incense, lily, and cedarwood

Matiere Premiere Encens Suave

Smells like: the reminder that every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. Church-lady goss in the vestibule after Sunday mass. Repentance. Dark and sumptuous!

Notes: coffee, incense, Madagascar vanilla, benzoin, labdanum.

Byredo Vanille Antique

Smells like: a chunky Fisherman sweater in a charity bin next to the votive candles. You snagged it and wore it without washing it first (no judgment) to bake Palmiers with your grandmother.

Notes: musk, plum, white wood, labdanum, vanilla, and amber.

Victoria Beckham Suite 302

Smells like: a splash of rose-infused holy water (why does no one do this??) and lingering incense. A gaggle of nuns on a cigarette break.

Notes: black cherry, red pepper, violet, rose, black leather, tobacco.

Margiela Fragrances By the Fireplace

Smells like: burning your sins at the stake and asking for forgiveness (not permission, live a little).

Notes: clove, pink pepper, orange blossom, chestnut, wood, juniper, vanilla, balsam, cashmeran.

Tom Ford Myrrhe Mystère

Smells like: a Lenten Sunday mass as the sunlight filters through stained glass windows, dust flies, candles flicker, and the organist plays Toccata and Fugue in D minor (Dracula is in the house).

Notes: myrrh, vanilla, cedarwood, cinnamon, incense, sandalwood, patchouli, leather.

Byredo De Los Santos

Smells like: tendrils of holy smoke, with the added benefit of hopefully warding off Negative Nancies by wearing it (so far, so good).

Notes: mirabelle, sage, orris root, musk, palo santo, ambroxan.